Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Ode to the Kidney Stone

My husband had a kidney stone
It’s made from calcium 
Yeah that’s like bone
And when it passed
I’m just glad he was at home

My husband had a kidney stone
It looks like God Zillah
His kidney was its home
It took a month but
It finally fell into the throne


Sorry the picture is blury, I didn't have my cable to connect my camera, so I took a picture of my camera with my phone and sent it to myself.

24 comments:

  1. Your beautiful poetry always brings a tear to my eye. More importantly...look! Steve's kidney stone is famous!

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  2. This was so powerful, so moving... now I want a kidney stone of my own.

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  3. Holy fuckballs, that thing is huge. Give your husband my condolences.

    An aunt once told me it's far worse that childbirth and, "It feels like someone's pulling your insides out through your hooter."

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  4. How about you pick something else to get and I'll write a poem about that. I wouldn't wish a kidney stone on anybody. How about something harmless like a zit.

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  5. He was on a hefty dose of Vocodin for the last month, and it was more uncomfortable the two days before, he didn't even really know it was coming out until he saw it in the bowl.
    Hooter! HAH

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  6. Liz's "Holy Fuck Balls" is right!  Damn!  I'm so sorry he went through this.  Agonizing I'm sure!

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  7. Having a husband with famous stones is not all bad, Madge.

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  8. I know! I was hoping I could wrap it in wire and wear it as a charm, but not now that it's so ugly.

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  9. You wrote the the F word, you wrote the F word, neener neener neener.
    You never write the F word.
    Yeah, he wasn't a happy camper.

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  10. Madge, I was just copying Liz.  She's a bad influence on me.  But I love her.  I don't use the F word very often.  But once in a while, it has a great impact!

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  11. I hate the fuckin' F word.

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  12. We're all a bad influence on eachother. I like it that way. We're like a whirling dervish of cussary.

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  13. Hey MWJ, I've been thinking about you, I was going to email you today, glad to see you're peering out from under the rock.

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  14. Cha, he needs to get out and shake the money makers now that they're famous.

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  15. You do not.  You use it more than anybody I know.

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  16. We're whirling all right!  I guess it's tie to get dressed.

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  17. I meant to say "time" but "tie" works too if I wanted to wear one.  But I don't.

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  18. Oh come on, Madge, we use the handcuffs and you do too.
     

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  19. Nope, I'm always scared we're going to lose the key, but we always have scissors.

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